Gluttony.
Another deadly sin I am certainly guilty of (for my sins. Hang on, that's the point isn't it? I'm right then) and I think that many of us are during The Year of Corona. Aren't we? Just me? Oh, OK.
We simply aren't moving around all that much, are we? Since Boris closed the pubs and told us stay at home, protect the NHS. Although that message has shifted to stay alert and something something. Keep protecting the NHS? I have genuinely forgotten and I will NOT look it up. Now that there are all these protests going on Covid-19 seems to have been put on the back-burner. Conspiracy theory hat on: because they want us to get it and die?
OK, so sometimes I fancy a bit of chocolate. Now, I'd like to be the kind of psychopath who can neatly break off one square of chocolate, mindfully look at it, mindfully smell it, mindfully contemplate it, mindfully put it in my mouth (in my motherfuckin' mouth - reference humour there for those who know that song), and mindfully eat it in a savouring kinda fashion. Seriously, this is how one is supposed to eat. I read a book about it (called, surprisingly, "Mindful Eating"). However, I am not that kind of psychopath. I'm a different kind. I'm not sure which kind and Buzzfeed has failed to come up with a "What kind of psychopath are you?" quiz. So, we'll never know.
I go buy a bar of chocolate. I break off a square. I shove it in my mouth (in my motherfuckin' mouth) put the rest of the chocolate bar away, sit down, stand up, go get the chocolate bar, think, 'fuck it', and eat the rest.
Know why?
Because somehow it makes sense to me to get rid of it rather than have it infecting my flat and my thoughts. Out of sight (in my stomach), out of mind. "So, Vicky WHY BUY IT IN THE FIRST PLACE YOU FOOL?" I hear you ask, quite rudely.
Because, I am a glutton and I am going to go to Hell for that so I may as well eat chocolate before my eternal damnation. And if that doesn't make any sense to you, well, I don't know what to tell you.
We simply aren't moving around all that much, are we? Since Boris closed the pubs and told us stay at home, protect the NHS. Although that message has shifted to stay alert and something something. Keep protecting the NHS? I have genuinely forgotten and I will NOT look it up. Now that there are all these protests going on Covid-19 seems to have been put on the back-burner. Conspiracy theory hat on: because they want us to get it and die?
Anyway, gluttony. Here's an example of my flawed thinking that leads me down the path of overindulgence. Ready?
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| My attempt at being less calorific |
OK, so sometimes I fancy a bit of chocolate. Now, I'd like to be the kind of psychopath who can neatly break off one square of chocolate, mindfully look at it, mindfully smell it, mindfully contemplate it, mindfully put it in my mouth (in my motherfuckin' mouth - reference humour there for those who know that song), and mindfully eat it in a savouring kinda fashion. Seriously, this is how one is supposed to eat. I read a book about it (called, surprisingly, "Mindful Eating"). However, I am not that kind of psychopath. I'm a different kind. I'm not sure which kind and Buzzfeed has failed to come up with a "What kind of psychopath are you?" quiz. So, we'll never know.
I go buy a bar of chocolate. I break off a square. I shove it in my mouth (in my motherfuckin' mouth) put the rest of the chocolate bar away, sit down, stand up, go get the chocolate bar, think, 'fuck it', and eat the rest.
Know why?
Because somehow it makes sense to me to get rid of it rather than have it infecting my flat and my thoughts. Out of sight (in my stomach), out of mind. "So, Vicky WHY BUY IT IN THE FIRST PLACE YOU FOOL?" I hear you ask, quite rudely.
Because, I am a glutton and I am going to go to Hell for that so I may as well eat chocolate before my eternal damnation. And if that doesn't make any sense to you, well, I don't know what to tell you.
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